


Innocent Mischief

by Izzu



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-05-02
Updated: 2006-05-02
Packaged: 2017-11-08 12:48:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/443362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Izzu/pseuds/Izzu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roy was bored. and being watched constantly as one of the Human Sacrifice while his whole crew were scattered around Amestris is so.... NOT GOOD for Roy's sanity</p>
            </blockquote>





	Innocent Mischief

"Colonel... the evaluation is nearing! And you had not done anything! Buck up won't you!?"

Pride stopped abruptly as he happened to pass Roy's office and peered in out of curiousity. It's weird to sort of imagine... First Lieutenant Hawkeye's voice... to be so-

Masculine? But then, she was supposed to be working under Bradley already...

Several other voices came about as his curiousity overwhelmed him. He thought after that reassignment order, all of the colonel's crews should not be around with him now. To his surprise, he saw the colonel staring at the blank space as he 'chewed' on a pencil.

"Yeah right, First Lieutenant Hawkeye... I agree with you! But the colonel here... well, you know-", said Roy as he imitated Havoc's way of speech as he reverted to his old self. "What do you mean Havoc? I can be as capable as any other officer here-!"

"Oh? Then... start doing your work! Idiot!", said Roy in a Riza-like manner as he hit his head, in a mocking way. "Yes Riza..." said Roy gloomily as he goes into silence and did his job.

Pride thought that this was the end of Roy's strange manner and started to leave as Roy squealed aloud. "But I HATE signing all these papers!! And how could I start writing out all of the research if I still had to finish checking these stuff-?", he cried before berating himself in again, Riza-like way. "Come Colonel! Don't be such a baby!", as Roy sighed and went quiet again.

Pride shook his head as he turned towards the Fuhrer's office instead. Had the Flame Alchemist blown his fuse finally? This is no good... but he must first report on this...

xxx

King Bradley lifted his brow towards Pride as the homunculus explained his 'findings'. Riza found it hard to keep a straight face hearing it. She pretended as if she haven't been listening to the conversation when the Fuhrer turned towards her, as she acted like it was normal for a well grown man to behave so... strangely. Really, her very adorable colonel...!

xxx

"Aaah! No. I don't think Second Lieutenant Breda  _talked_  like that. You did a perfect imitation of Havoc though...", said Edward as Roy gave him a cynical look.

"Oh? Like you really know my men more than I do-? Hmm... but really. It was kinda quiet when all of them aren't here though..."

"Now you finally realize you missed them? Poor you-"

"Shut up! I could go on with life without them... you'll see!", said Roy defensively as he made perfect imitation of Riza with her 'hand gun' as he kept poking Edward all over.

Edward laughed. "Haha... but you can't live without First Lieutenant constantly spoiling you, isn't it?", said Edward wickedly as Roy attacked.

"Like who's saying it! Who was it that was coward enough never to admit he loved- oof!", Roy fell on the floor tackled by a red-faced Edward.

"Who said anything that I liked Winry-?"

"There... there!?", teased Roy again as nearby officers overheard sounds of bloody massacre from the aforementioned office-

xxx

_To nurture a full blown love, a lot of attention is needed for Hilda to fully manifest her beauty in order to get the right reaction. How high is Hilda's ability would depend on how much skill is used to acquire her and can reach a very high mark if one was skilled enough. But then too much of effort for such simple task can be fatal as you might not be able to control the result since Havoc's smoking habit can be disasterous to her presence. It's best not to be careless. After all... Hilda is a very hot-tempered lady! And that's no way to get the spark going if you flirt with her the wrong way._

_In term of agggresiveness, Hilda made top choice before Olivia since Olivia can only make give her love just hot and massive enough to make a lasting memory. But Hilda... she can be a bang if enough care is done. Getting Hilda and/or Olivia to get the party started is not really that hard... since you can hardly get thirsty around here. There were abundant amount of refreshing beverage that you can find. And you can never get too drunk._

_There are enough uses that you can get from the ladies charms... and you can take it for a ride too. But, well, like stated before, Hilda is one unstable girl and Olivia was not strong enough to do the job. It's probably not a good decison to put good use of Hilda's ability. But a better choice would probably getting Hilda a makeover to turn her to a more stable person. Like Helen. And one Helen equals two Hilda's anyway. and she was better than Hilda too. Less air-headed if you know what I mean..._

Edward glared towards Roy as he had to write out everything that the man had recited while Roy paused, staring at Ed. "What-? Continue writing and I'd do yours after this!"

Edward slammed his fist on the table. "But why must I be the one writing it? You're the one who had to be doing all the-", Roy scolded him tartly as he waved at him his original research paper. 

"I had to make the non-encrypted part first... or else it's hard to encrypt it, idiot. And it was better if I got the original copy. Better to make the Fuhrer understand all those gibberish than me having to explain all over again. And it'll be a nice prank...  _how dare he took my Riza!_ And yes Edward, we'll play another role-playing game after this so that we won't have to really bore ourselves in this horrid  _prison-_ ", said the colonel as Edward shook his head. Man... but probably he'd try Roy's method. He can't expect to do physical evaluations all the time, can he?

And Edward sighed as Roy started composing his 'storytelling' as he wrote all of that junk down...

Then again... he's right. After all of the Mustang crew being separated and he had Al laying low and not wanting to endanger Winry's safety, he can't afford to run around freely anymore. It's undeniable that he and Roy now are trapped inside this cage called the Military Headquarters and the only way for them to beat them is to find out how the homunculus really worked.

So... they had to bid their time. And what good way to do it other than having a little fun while making the top people crazy? Really... he never thought the colonel would think of this kind of plan.

But then... he's just probably very bored.

xxx

King Bradley blinked very hard as he had difficulty to actually understand the two manuscript passed by the two persons in front of him. But then... wasn't that the actual purpose of them doing their work as a State Alchemist? Doing their research while making it in a way that normal people won't understand what they were studying about. But these two works... were a little different that the kind of things the two normally pass up and with recent events being considered, he wondered if they just pulling his legs for the fun of it.

Roy and Edward grinned as they pulled out ANOTHER manuscripts and present it to him. "Your Excellency, here's the original copy of our research. Don't worry... the colonel definitely going to destroy it after you've read it.", said Edward innocently as Roy quipped.

"We've considered that it'll be difficult for you to validate our performance if you don't understand our works, so-"

King Bradley just waved them off as the two alchemist came out, snickering...

xxx

Riza marched ladylike into the lone office that she had formerly worked in as she closed the door behind her. It was a strange sight. The formerly crowded office space were now empty save the two persons, who were unusually... acting very friendly to each other where ages ago, the only thing that will happen the moment the two met in that same room will be just petty childish fights.

And now both of them were together chatting alternately between themselves through the phone as she started to smile.

"And yeah... since the guys are all over the continent and-"

"Oh... excuse me a sec, Ed... aah! Havoc, how's life at home? You know... we can still drop by...  _you_ must have been very bored...", said Roy as Ed grabbed the phone back.

"-really, we had so much time here without you guys so-"

Riza chuckled as she glanced at her watch. It was already past her work hours and those bastards has no power to say that she can't greet her fellow companions during her free time, isn't it? She walked over towards them as Edward finished talking and ended the call.

Riza grabbed both of them by their shoulders as the two glanced at her almost impishly. "You guys... are naughty! Bad boys- teasing the poor guy who can't move so much while you're here making a silly hat over yourselves!", she said in amusement as Roy and Edward grinned at her.

"And we're gonna do it again tomorrow... and the day after that. I finally understood why Hughes love to call me so often. It's fun doing it!", said Roy in a soft whisper. The mention of Hughes was to divert the subject matter anyway.

Edward chuckled. "Yeah... and if we keep it like this perhaps luck can even do miracle and help us! It's a small world after all.. No use fretting over old  _scar_  anyway. It probably gonna help us soon."

Riza grinnned as she ruffled Roy's hair. "I wonder how your  _parents_  ever stand the two of you...", she said as she passed a small slip of paper towards them. It seemed that she had overheard the homunculus discussion over their apparent  _business_  at the time as she stressed the words towards Edward. Roy picked up the old newspaper article over the mysterious death of a suspected alchemist whose body was  _not found_ after some thorough  _search_.

Roy and Edward stared at each other as Edward remembered the last time he had met his father. Aunt Pinako had told him that his father had been telling her to leave the place for no reason some time ago. And that weird guy at the basement seemed to know his father too. Could it be coincident? Man... it's the first time he's glad that he still had his father to settle this unsettled matters...

"I don't know. They usually ignored me since they always so busy. I always can get away from trouble...", said Edward as Roy pulverised the article with a slight twist of a finger.

"No wonder... but I was also curious after you told me about them. Do they really like some  _people_  here?"

"Umm... yeah...", said the lad as Roy immediately changed the subject. "Ah... but we're talking about Edward! Certainly this was not something as simple. Probably people ignored the  _bean_  just in order to get a more peaceful life-"

"Whut-?"

And Riza grinned at how the scene reverted back towards the old 'Roy tease Ed episodes' as she spied the shadow moving away from the door, seemingly satisfied that they had not done anything remotely suspicious.

They were threading on fire right now... but still-

Better they had some fun while doing it.

**Author's Note:**

> For anyone curious, the excerpt on Roy's 'research' was just about the reactivity of Oxygen, Hydrogen and Helium gases with respect to their use and flammability.


End file.
